It is funny that I thought when I'll be back home, things are gonna be different. It's funnier when I discover that the difference is littler than what I've expected. I have told myself so many fucking times that expectation is the rust that would destroy all my hopes. It would take up all my courage, exhaust all my strengths, and fortify my weaknesses.
I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change that I have spent on you
Where have the times gone baby
It's all wrong, where are the plans I made for two
How could one continue on hoping and holding on when it's already hurting too much?
How could I possibly be that person who hurts another person and then one other person could possibly be hurting me in return? What are the odds that such situation shall arise? What would be the result?
I know it's hard to remember the people we used to be
It's even harder to picture that you're not here next to me
You said it's too late to make it
But is it too late to try?
Things get scary for me when it's time to sleep at night. I don't sleep much... I just tell myself I do. I think a lot before I sleep and thinking doesn't help me at all. I have so many regrets in life, and I am shitless scared that this would be another one for the list...
I've wasted my nights
You turned out the lights. now I'm paralyzed
Still stuck in that time when we called it love
But even the sun sets in paradise
Oh damn you. You are playing me. My heart is not an object to be played with. My intelligence shall never be insulted. I hate you. I hate you for making me feel like this. I hate you for being always the one having the power to melt all my defenses and then let me down in the end. Most of all, I hate you because I love you. I love you that it breaks my own heart just thinking about it. Oh damn.
Heartless people are people who, once, have loved too much.
Damn, again.
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